Before I begin this week's column of mine, I’d just like to let everyone know that the ongoing ‘Britain in Decline’ series will be a fortnightly (that’s every two weeks, for all you Americans) feature. I’m a pretty happy and upbeat person, so writing about a topic so depressing week after week isn’t something I fancy doing. 

So, with that in mind, on to this week’s much less depressing column featuring war, genocide, and tyranny! Hooray!

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 History and Me

 My name is Arthur Fisher and I am a history addict.

 Man, it felt good to get that off my chest!

I’ve been addicted to history for as long as I can recall. I remember my first ever history book (a nice illustrated hardback with a picture of Lord Nelson on the front) that I must have gotten when I was eight or nine at the oldest. I remember the historical obsessions of my childhood being centred on what was being taught in my history class that term (Vikings, Rome, Dinosaurs, etc…). I remember being one of those loser-kids, who not only enjoyed going to museums, but would rather do that than go to a football game or a destruction derby!

 You know, it really isn’t easy being a history-junkie.

 A career as a historian is very unlikely to garner you great wealth, and people tend to have a certain attitude towards history (and indeed, history majors) that goes along the lines of “what good is that?”

 For some bizarre reason, many seem to think that the study of broken-down old buildings and dead people has very little practical application to the modern world.

Shocking, I know! They seem to believe that wishy-washy subjects like quantum-physics and advanced calculus are more useful and relevant.

 Needless to say, I do not hold to that point of view, and furthermore, I say piffle and poppycock to all who do!

 Excuse my French, but sometimes harsh language is needed.

 There’s an old Churchill quote that’s pretty much the motto of every history boffin from here to Beijing, and it goes: “Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it.” My friends, subjects like math, science, media-studies, and medicine are all very important in today’s world, but only one can save all of humanity from obliterating itself, and that’s history.

 Oh yes, I don’t consider it hyperbole to say that without the widespread study of history, humanity will be in for some rocky times ahead. How can you expect to prevent another Hitler, World War, or heaven forbid, another Holocaust without studying what caused it all to happen the first time around?

 You don’t need to spend £20 talking to some crazy-mystic to see into the future. All you need to do is study the past.

 The classic cliché of ‘history repeats itself’ couldn’t be truer. We all like to think we’re entering a brave new world, what with our unparalleled leaps in technology and great discoveries about our world and the universe around us, but as every historian knows, no matter how advanced or enlightened a society gets they’ll always find a way to screw it all up! Rome fell to the barbarian hordes; the Greek states tore themselves apart; Atlantis forgot the dangers of building below sea-level.

 I know, I know, this little rant sounds like I’m preaching doom and gloom again, just like last week, and I promised not to do that this time.

 So let me qualify my statements about the impending downfall of everything we hold dear by saying that it doesn’t have to happen! That’s right, it’ll only happen if we don’t see it coming, and as I said before, if we take the time to study those that came before us, we will see it coming and can prevent it from happening.

 Now I’m not arrogant enough to say that we scholars of history are great prophets and visionaries who should be admired, raised to elevated levels in society, and given copious amounts of cash in exchange for our unlimited wisdom… so I’ll just let you all come to that conclusion on your own. What I will say, however, is that the study of history is anything but a wasted pursuit and definitely not something to be scoffed at!

 So, again I say, I am a history addict, but I am not ashamed!

 You rocket scientists and brain surgeons can laugh all you want, but when what’s left of humanity is crawling out of the sewers following World War 9, my gravestone will simply say: “I told you so.”

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